There are moments when something arises within me before I have consciously thought about it. An impulse, a change in my body, a distinct feeling that is suddenly there. Especially in the beginning, I often found it difficult to distinguish whether I was sensing fear or whether something was showing itself that I would describe as intuition. Both can arise very quickly, both can alter my physical state, and both can make me perceive my surroundings more intensely.
Over time, I therefore began to look less for a quick label and to pay closer attention to how these experiences actually show themselves in me. I noticed that fear often begins deep in my lower abdomen. It appears quickly and immediately sets something in motion throughout my whole body. My heart begins to beat more strongly or more quickly, my breathing becomes shorter and sometimes faster as well, while tension builds in my body at the same time. There is also often a sense of pressure that I cannot always identify more precisely at first.
My perception of my surroundings also changes noticeably in this state. Sounds, movements, people or the atmosphere of a room become more prominent. It feels to me as though my whole system becomes more alert and wants to take in as much as possible at once. How long this lasts varies. If I am generally calm and balanced, the state can ease again relatively quickly. If I am already tense or preoccupied with many things, this inner movement sometimes remains for longer.
I also experience intuition as something that can arise suddenly, but the physical quality feels different to me. It tends to begin in the chest, often almost as though it were coming from the heart. From there, the sensation spreads further through the body. It is not weak, but it is gentler. My perception becomes more intense without the same pressure that I associate with fear.
I also notice my surroundings more clearly then. Sounds, people, movements or the atmosphere of a room can feel very present, but my attention does not feel tense. Instead, it seems to widen and become clearer. I feel less of a need to protect myself or react immediately. This sensation can remain for a while and, depending on what it relates to, sometimes last for several hours.
At the beginning of my path, I could not perceive these differences so clearly. When a strong feeling suddenly appeared, all I knew at first was that something was happening. Only through many such situations and repeated observation did I gradually learn, for myself, to distinguish intuition from fear and to recognise that the strength of a sensation is not the only thing that matters. What became far more important to me was the question of its quality and of what was happening throughout my whole body at the same time.
That is why today I do not make an immediate decision from either fear or an intuitive impulse. If the situation allows it, I wait. I first observe my body, my breathing and my thoughts, but also the specific situation and my surroundings. I do not try to classify the feeling immediately. I give it time to show itself.
With fear, I often experience something shifting once my body becomes calmer again. The pressure eases, my breathing becomes freer, and the strong need to react immediately loses some of its force. Then I can see more clearly what genuinely belongs to the situation and what may have been part of my initial physical response.
With intuitive perceptions, by contrast, I have more often experienced something remaining quietly present. It does not have to become louder, nor does it keep pressing me. And yet it does not simply disappear once I relax. Over the years, this quiet persistence has become an important distinction for me.
I do not see this as an infallible rule, however. My perception remains my perception, shaped by my experiences, my state at that particular moment and everything that is part of who I am. So I would not claim that fear always begins in the lower abdomen or that intuition comes from the chest for everyone. I can only describe how I have experienced these differences in myself over a long period of time.
For me, this attitude has changed a great deal. I do not have to turn a strong inner impulse into a truth immediately. I can notice it, give it space and observe what happens. This creates a small distance between feeling and decision, and that distance often gives me more clarity than acting straight away.
Once I have finally made and acted on a decision, I often notice something else as well. The intensity changes again. The tension may release, or the intuitive perception may gradually recede. To me, it often feels as though something needed my attention and can settle again once the situation has been clarified.
Over the years, the question of whether I can immediately label every impulse correctly has become less important to me. What matters far more is remaining attentive enough to perceive its quality. Fear and intuition do not have to fight one another, and I do not have to declare either of them the winner straight away. Both show me something about my present state and about the way I am responding to a situation.
So when such a feeling suddenly arises within me today, my first question is no longer whether I should follow it. I first notice where it begins, how it spreads and what happens to my perception. And often it is only in this quiet observation that it becomes clear whether something in me is tightening or whether a space is opening that remains quietly present.